Here’s another movie from the sultan of softcore himself, Fred Olen Ray. He wrote this film under the name Sherman Scott and directed it under the name Nicholas Medina, two pseudonyms he’s used many times before. For the record, IMDB also has a poster showing this film credited as Bikini Cavegirl, which feels like a better title to me (since the lead character doesn’t appear to be a teenager, and it’s pretty creepy if she is supposed to be one), but I don’t see it listed for sale anywhere under that title.

It’s a short film, just under 1 hour and 10 minutes, and the plot is clearly not meant to be taken too seriously, but Ray and his cast do a very good job with the material, I must say.

The film begins “One Million Years” ago, where we see two cavepeople, that’s Jezebel Bond as Tahra, and Evan Stone as Tiko. One day Tahra is out by herself, I guess hunting or something, when she gets chased by a Tyrannosaurus Rex. Suddenly a mysterious portal, later referred to as a “black hole vortex”, appears in front of her, and so to get away from the T-Rex, she jumps through it. The vortex transports her to the present, where she’s found by Richard and Sharon, a couple of archeologists (played by Alexandre Boisvert aka Voodoo and Danielle Petty aka Kennedy Johnston), who take her back to their place to learn more about her. There they sit her in front of the TV, and Tahra quickly learns English, although she only speaks in commercial slogans. Meanwhile, back in the past, Tiko goes searching for Tahra and comes across the same portal and walks through it, also ending up in the present. He starts to track Tahra’s scent, making the journey to Richard and Sharon’s house.

Jay Richardson plays Dr. Matthews, a local professor whom Richard calls over to help examine Tahra and prove she’s a cavewoman. Richard thinks if he can prove this, Tahra will be a great scientific find and they can learn more about prehistoric times from her. But Dr. Matthews has more nefarious plans for Tahra once he realizes what she is. Nicole Sheridan plays Dr. Matthews’ assistant Cynthia, who initially goes along with his plans. Somehow Tiko makes it to the house too, looking for Tahra, but Dr. Matthews and Cynthia have already snuck her out of the house and taken her to his lab. Once Richard and Sharon find out, they rush to rescue Tahra, reunite her with Tiko, and then get them both back to their own time.

I won’t spoil the ending, other than to say that there is a funny plot twist at the very end.

Again, it’s not a serious film but it’s surprisingly good for what it is. While not high-budget, Ray managed to get some decent special effects in the opening scenes, as in addition to the T-Rex we also get a look at a triceratops, some pterodactyls, and a large giant scorpion-like thing.

Along the way, we get 6 hot sex scenes.

Jezebel Bond is in three, one with Evan Stone (that opens the film, as Tahra and Tiko are having sex in a cave), a lesbian bath scene with Danielle Petty, and there’s a foursome scene with her, Stone, Petty, and Sheridan.

Petty, Sheridan, and Stone also have a threesome scene together, and Petty has a scene with Boisvert.

Lezley Zen and Trevor Zen (I looked it up, they were married at the time, I don’t know if they still are today) play an unnamed couple. When Tiko arrives in the present and goes looking for Tara he comes across their car parked and peeks in and watches them as they have sex in the back of it.

An attractive cast, hot sex scenes, and a funny plot. It’s not one of Fred Olen Ray’s best films, but it’s entertaining. Chacebook rating: FOUR STARS

Jason Majercik is selling the UNRATED DVD for $29.99. Email him at quinn_nash@hotmail.com for his softcore inventory list.