Happy New Year!

Personally, 2023 was…not the greatest year for me and my family, for various reasons which I won’t get into here. But I have high hopes that 2024 will be better. And now I’m going to start of the year with a new post, doing what I’m most known for: reviewing softcore movies!

And yes this is a softcore movie, although you’d be forgiven for suspecting otherwise just based on the title. Dirty Milf Tales certainly sounds like a sleazy hardcore XXX film (not that I have anything against sleazy hardcore XXX films), and it seems like an odd title for this softcore film since none of the female characters in it appear to have children. I couldn’t even find this film listed on IMDB, which made me suspect that it may have originally been released under a different title, but I searched and couldn’t find any. So who knows?

This is not a fully new film, it’s a softcore greatest hits film, where a studio takes a bunch of sex scenes from previous films and reuses them, with a few new scenes filmed to create a wrap-around storyline. This is something Mainline Releasing many times in its later years.

Written by April White and directed by Robert Blossom, the film stars Gianna Lynn and Frankie Cullen as a married couple, Monica and Chase. Monica finds a pair of women’s panties that aren’t hers and realizes that Chase has cheated on her. That night, while Chase is out at a work function, Monica has her friends Paris and Alexis  (played by Nicole Oring and Franchezca Valentina) over for drinks, where she tells them what she found and they talk about it.

What Monica doesn’t know (but we do, because we see them together in the opening scene) is that Paris is the woman Chase is cheating with. But Paris plays it off, and for the rest of the night, the women talk about the relationship troubles of various other friends of theirs. And it’s those scenes that are shown as flashbacks.

Alexis comes over first, and she and Monica trade stories. At one point they’re sitting on the bed in the bedroom and they talk about how they’ve each occasionally fantasized about being with another woman. If you’re a fan of softcore films, you know where this is headed.

Then Paris shows up and joins them for drinks, and starts sharing her own stories of friends’ sex lives. Then Chase shows up and the two women leave, but not before it slips out that Paris is the other woman. Monica and Chase argue about what happened, Chase makes some lame excuses, and Monica decides to forgive him, and they have sex. THE END

The story is not exactly compelling, and certainly not very realistic. Monica forgives Chase way too quickly and doesn’t even seem super-angry at Paris for betraying her either. But I guess it serves its purpose in that it gives an excuse to include the flashback scenes. And the cast does a decent job with their roles, and the three new sex scenes are all smoking hot.

Of the flashbacks, we get a whopping 16 sex scenes. Of course the actors in those scenes are not credited, but I was able to identify most of them.

1/Robert Donavan and Summer Fields.
2/Robert Donavan and Flower Edwards.
3/Lisa Comshaw and Tomi Luutsford
4/Tess Broussard and Griffen Drew.
5/Mia Zottoli and Timothy Stempien
6/Susan Featherly and Richard Neil
7/Mia Zottoli and Richard Neil
8/Susan Featherly and Timothy Stempien.
9/Mia Zottoli and Tom Fry
10/Nancy Vee and Tom Fry
11/Michelle Lay and a man that I can’t recognize
12/T.J. Hart and Timothy Stempien
13/Lisa Comshaw and Nicholas Franklin Bray
14/a split scene that cuts back and forth between Joe Souza and Susan Hale having sex in one room, and Dee, Chloe, Jezebel Bond, Tony Tedeschi and Danny Pape having group sex in another room.
15/Dru Berrymore and a man that I can’t recognize

Altogether it’s an excellent collection of sex scenes, and since that is the main reason we watch these softcore movies, I have to give this a Chacebook rating of FIVE STARS

Jason Majercik is selling this UNRATED DVD for $19.99. Email him at quinn_nash@hotmail.com for his softcore inventory list