Brittney’s Bachelorette Party

Okay, well, it’s 2022, happy new year!

I guess I need to finally update this blog again, and what better way to do so than with what this blog of mine is most famous for:  a new softcore film review!

Unfortunately, while I wish that I could say I was starting this year off with a bang, it’s more of whimper. It’s my own fault for picking a film from Torchlight Pictures, a studio who’s output consistantly underwhelmes me. As I was preparing to write this, I checked my own review history of this studio. Of the nine Torchlight Pictures films that I’ve reveiwed so far, I’ve given Love In The Bosses Office 2  The Secret Desires of A Housewife  and Naughty Neighbors four stars, I gave My Best Friend’s Wife and My Best Friend’s Wife 2 three stars, I gave Seducer By Night  and Erin’s Erotic Nights two and a half stars and I gave A Housewife Named Brandy and After The Prom two stars. And I notice that  of the four and five star films, that’s usually based solely on the strength of the sex scenes. Sometimes the sex scenes are really good which makes the film worth watching, even if it’s just to skip forward to each scene, but other than that the films tend to have weak stories and bad acting.

So Torchlight Pictures is no MRG Entertainment, or Retromedia. Is this film one of their better ones? I’ll skip to the end and just say no.

Written by Anora Leachim and directed by Francis Locke, this film is about a woman named Brittney who arrives in Las Vegas with her fiance the weekend before they’re about to get married. Brittney is waiting for three of her closet female friends who are driving to Las Vegas to join her for her Bachelorette Party, where they plan to hire a male stripper. But the three ladies get lost on the way there because they take a wrong turn somewhere, and their SUV breaks down. So they end up having to spend the night in a cheap motel and decide to go ahead and hire a male stripper for themselves, finding him in a phonebook, who comes over and has sex with each one of them. Meanwhile Brittney just spends the night with her fiance.

That’s it, It’s not the worst story for a softcore film, but the first problem for me is that like many of Tochlight’s films, they don’t list the names of any of the characters in the credits, and only two of three characters in the film are ever directly referred to by name. The actresses credited are Elizabeth Grace, Natasha Young, Darien Ross and Jenna West. But I don’t know any of these woman, I checked and whichever one is Jenna West is not the same actress I know from The Seduction of Maxine and some other productions (unless she’s had some plastic surgery after, as the previous film came out in 2000 and this one came out in 2006). So I don’t know which one she’s supposed to be, whether she’s the actress playing Brittney, or one of Brittney’s three friends, one of whom is referred to as Kylie, but the other two are nameless in this film. Brittney’s fiance (no name given) is played by Dino Bravo, and the male stripper is played by Dante Brice and Dante is also the name of his character.

We only get five full sex scenes in this film (which is just about and hour and eighteen minutes long). There are two between the actress who plays Brittney and her fiance. One in the beginning of the film when they enter their hotel room in Vegas, and another one in the ending of the film when Brittney finds out there her friends aren’t coming so she can’t have her Bachelorette party. And those are really the highlights of the film.

In another scene the ladies pull over in the desert because Kylie has to go off in some bushes to do “number two”. While the other two are left waiting for her, they suddenly get horny for each other and decide to get into the back of the SUV and have sex. But it’s pretty tame as far as lesbian sex scenes go, they both just get topless but leave their pants on and kiss a bit while taking turns put their hands down the front of each others pants. Then later in the motel room after they call the stripper over, he arrives and says he needs to change into his stripper costume and the two ladies direct him to the bathroom. But Kylie’s already in there in just her bra and panties and the two of them have sex. That’s a decent scene. The stripper comes back out (still not changed) where the other two ladies are on the bed playing Yahtze, he sits down next to her and one of the women leaves for some reason and the stripper starts making out with the other. They begin to have sex, but the film cuts out before they actually do it, and just skips to the aftermath. Then they do the same with the stripper and the other woman. So what was even the point? Then finally the stripper gets into his costume, a police uniform, getting ready to perform for the women, but they’ve already compared notes and found out that they’ve each had sex with him already (somehow they didn’t know this as it was happening in that tiny motel room) and decide they all want to have sex with him at once now.

And when four-way sex scene between one man and three woman is boring, you know you’ve made a bad softcore film

So, sadly this is another TWO STAR film that I’d say is best skipping.


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